Every birth is different and beautiful in its own way. From the personalities, time of day, labor itself and all the different pieces of the puzzle that come together in bringing a life into the world. My favorite part is the relationship of the couple. I feel a bit like an anthropologist discovering the nature of a relationship as it unfolds. I can’t imagine what runs through a husbands mind watching his wife go through the pain, fear, excitement and then just pain all over again. Some husbands beg for others who know more to run in and aid while others literally never sit down because they want to be as uncomfortable as possible in supplication. Their helplessness is in so many ways a beautiful countercultural thing to capture. They can’t do anything but submit to the fact they have played a role in bringing this pain and that soon they will become a father.
For this birth it was the latter, he was begging to be with his wife at all times. Most of the time G wanted to forego the stool he could sit on just to stand at her side and be anything she needed. They were a force together and he knew the value of being her solid support throughout the entire day.
Watching the mother is of course the greatest piece of the puzzle. The endurance and bodily bravery is beyond anything else in the world. Like an Olympic runner or mountaineer climbing Everest. A mother is perseverant in pain and fear. It’s a beautiful and long endeavor that’s met with a lifetime of purpose. Your motherhood is on the end of this painful tunnel and you are fighting with every breath and contraction for it.
C was incredible, fierce and ready to be that mother. There were moments of fear but she handled them with a spirit of a fierce mother lion bringing new life into the world.
After several hours of natural contractions C was left at a plateau of 9cm. She wanted so desperately to push through to the end but after 5 hours sitting right at 9 she decided to try the epidural. From their her heart rate sky rocketed and while the room stayed calm there were specks of fear in everyone’s eyes. But C took these moments in stride holding one hand to the oxygen mask and other in G’s. She pushed her little boy into the world.
They had waited to find out the gender so the resounding joy of “it’s a boy, it’s really boy” coming from G was all anyone could here for those first few seconds. He was so overcome he almost said no to cutting the cord. When their little one was finally placed on C’s chest it was straight waterworks all around. Pure joy, adrenaline and emotion flooded the whole room as C and G kept saying, “We love you, we’re so happy to meet you.”
They say you forget the pain and worry the moment you’re holding your baby in your arms. In so many ways I think that’s true but should we forget? For every great and wonderful thing there is a process, usually a process of struggle. But that’s what makes a thing so wonderful, the path of struggle that ends in a brand new life.